Changing My Mind
I've found that changing your own mind can be challenging.
This morning, I was to take Roxy to day camp and then I planned to go to the DMV to become an official New York resident (i.e. get my plates and license changed). I pondered whether I should take my car or Kef's, because mine is not 4-wheel-drive. I pondered whether there would be a line at the DMV. I figured there wouldn't be because the "weather is bad." As I was driving away from the house, two things struck me:
A couple of weeks ago, I was having breakfast with a new networking connection. I made a comment about our trip to Sedona as "vacation from being on vacation." She said, "You have to stop thinking that way. Looking for a job is a full time job." Well, of course it is. I know that. Yet the feeling of being on vacation has slipped into my mind and become my way of thinking. I have to intentionally change my mind.
I have always found it difficult to change my own mind. I'm very set in my routines. So, when it comes time to change one (especially if it's a mental routine)... it's just plain hard. I know there's all kinds of research about mental pathways and how habits form in the mind. So I googled to see how science would speak into this issue in some way. In my reading, I found an article that described the opposite of performing out of habit as performing "goal-directed action" ("How the brain makes, and breaks, a habit" in Science Daily).
We always talk about the importance of having goals... but I never really thought of having goals as the opposite of having habits. It does make sense, though. I brush my teeth out of habit... but if I don't floss out of habit, I have to make it a goal to floss. I have to bend my mind to remember to floss, because it's my goal to do so. And then, eventually, that will become a habit too.
So how, then, can a goal-directed action help me change my mind? For me, the not working vs. being on vacation mentality boils down to productivity. So, if I make productivity a goal each day, then it won't feel like I'm on vacation. The holing up vs. getting out mentality of snowy days boils down to motivation. If I have a sufficient reason to leave the house on a snowy day, then that goal (whatever it is) has to trump the habit of staying inside. I think that one will take some practice. Just doing it. (Once I have a job, that will be a strong motivator anyway.)
Bottom line: my goal for today is productivity. And I have to pick Roxy up at the end of the day, so that's sufficient motivation to leave the house regardless of snow. Kef would be quite upset if I just left her there.
This morning, I was to take Roxy to day camp and then I planned to go to the DMV to become an official New York resident (i.e. get my plates and license changed). I pondered whether I should take my car or Kef's, because mine is not 4-wheel-drive. I pondered whether there would be a line at the DMV. I figured there wouldn't be because the "weather is bad." As I was driving away from the house, two things struck me:
- The weather is not bad... to them. If I were still in Texas and had this weather, everyone would be holed up in their houses. Waiting. Here, this is perfectly normal and actually quite pleasant. It's currently not snowing. No precipitation coming down at all, actually. So... it's just another day. Not a bad weather day. Therefore, anyone and everyone could be out and about... just like any other day.
- There are thousands of people driving cars around here that are 2-wheel-drive. Plus, there's no ice, no snow on the roadways (just piled beside the roads). So why would it be unsafe to drive around in my car?
A couple of weeks ago, I was having breakfast with a new networking connection. I made a comment about our trip to Sedona as "vacation from being on vacation." She said, "You have to stop thinking that way. Looking for a job is a full time job." Well, of course it is. I know that. Yet the feeling of being on vacation has slipped into my mind and become my way of thinking. I have to intentionally change my mind.
I have always found it difficult to change my own mind. I'm very set in my routines. So, when it comes time to change one (especially if it's a mental routine)... it's just plain hard. I know there's all kinds of research about mental pathways and how habits form in the mind. So I googled to see how science would speak into this issue in some way. In my reading, I found an article that described the opposite of performing out of habit as performing "goal-directed action" ("How the brain makes, and breaks, a habit" in Science Daily).
We always talk about the importance of having goals... but I never really thought of having goals as the opposite of having habits. It does make sense, though. I brush my teeth out of habit... but if I don't floss out of habit, I have to make it a goal to floss. I have to bend my mind to remember to floss, because it's my goal to do so. And then, eventually, that will become a habit too.
So how, then, can a goal-directed action help me change my mind? For me, the not working vs. being on vacation mentality boils down to productivity. So, if I make productivity a goal each day, then it won't feel like I'm on vacation. The holing up vs. getting out mentality of snowy days boils down to motivation. If I have a sufficient reason to leave the house on a snowy day, then that goal (whatever it is) has to trump the habit of staying inside. I think that one will take some practice. Just doing it. (Once I have a job, that will be a strong motivator anyway.)
Bottom line: my goal for today is productivity. And I have to pick Roxy up at the end of the day, so that's sufficient motivation to leave the house regardless of snow. Kef would be quite upset if I just left her there.
Comments
Post a Comment